Bad Month for the Greenies

Well, that was a bad month for the greenies, wasn't it?

Spinach, that dark green leafy substance that's supposed to make us healthy, suddenly turned lethal and sickened hundreds of innocent folk with its noxious E. coli germs. An elderly woman and a toddler have been killed by it -- killed by spinach! -- so far. The toddler when he was fed, of all things, a SMOOTHIE made from spinach. A smoothie, for chrissakes. How screamingly correct can you get. And the poor wee thing died from it.

Just an aside -- Who in god's name would feed a spinach smoothie to a two year old? What were those parents thinking?

We had barely assimilated the shock of the toxic spinach when we learned from the venerable David Suzuki foundation that Canadian fruit and vegetables COULD BE laden with pesticides. Could be. Might be. The official stats are pretty suspect. Looks like, anyhow, that there's a distinct possibility that the levels of pesticides on fruits and vegetables are high enough to cause concern. Could very well accumulate in your body and mess with your cell structure. Make you and your progency very, very sick.

Very, very disconcerting.

Then we found out that carrot juice -- 100% organic carrot juice, no less -- is making people sick with botulism. Something about not washing the carrots enough before processing them. Comes from California -- same American state as the spinach.

Add to that the horribly upsetting news that lettuce (also from California, by the way) could also be laden with E. coli. This on top of the usual salmonella that somehow finds its way onto California iceberg. How in hell do you get salmonella on lettuce anyway? What the hell is going on in our field of vegetarian dreams these days?

Maybe it's time to step back from those easy, self-righteous assumptions about the good life and the flaxen goodness of vegetable eating.

Ain't no guarantees in life, it seems, and there ain't no easy path to salvation.

Bad news for the morally superior, eh?

Excuse me for smirking.

Maybe all those little kids with their instinctive dislike for leafy greens, and all those adult males who hankered after meat and potatoes, were on to something. Maybe they were right -- leafy greens DO taste like schleck and they're bad for you too. Rabbit food. With a toxic kick.

So, my green friends, the ball is in your court. What do you say?

I say a little humility goes a long, long way. Maybe you haven't got life all figured out yet.